The Lost Community

A faith community: a group of people who shares our vision for life, our values, our beliefs, and our passions. What happens when it’s lost? Living without a community of people who share our deeper spiritual stirrings is an isolating experience.

The following is a text version of this blog.

He was very thoughtful when he made the statement.  He chose his words carefully.  He began, “I think I lost my faith.”  He paused and then continued.  “No, that’s not right.  I know what I believe.  What I lost is my faith community. That’s what I lost: a community that shared the same passion, outlook, and commitment.”  While this man’s story is unique because of his individual circumstances, his experience of not having a faith community is something I’ve heard from many people.  Where do we go and what do we do when we are unable to find a community that shares our beliefs and values? 

The man I’m talking about is in his 20s.  He was raised in a conservative Christian church and family in rural United States.  As a young adult, he began to read the gospels more thoughtfully and came to understand that the message of Jesus was far different from what he had been taught.  His new insights led him out of conservative Christianity to become what he calls a radical.  He’s deeply committed to working to improve the lives of others, to causes of social justice, and to uproot the foundations of inequality.  But he hasn’t found many others quite like himself.  He longs for a community of faith that shares his understanding of the teachings of Jesus.


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People suggested that he try progressive Christian congregations.  He has found that while they have an understanding of the teachings of Jesus in ways similar to his own, when it comes to living it out in daily life, well, they just aren’t much different than the church in which he grew up. Perhaps they collect food for the food bank or volunteer now and then at homeless shelters.  Other than occasional volunteer projects, their focus is on the needs of their own members, their own church, and the things that make them comfortable.

I know that he’s not alone.  About half of the people who see me for spiritual direction are under the age of 40.  They all share this same experience.  They aren’t sure where they fit.  Most of these people have degrees from seminaries.  A couple of them were ordained as ministers.  But finding a community of faith that takes seriously the teachings of Jesus, well, they aren’t sure where to go. One finds that she can talk about her faith in a group led by a Hindu teacher.  She feels awkward about that.  Another participates in Sunday services online with a church about a thousand miles away.  He likes that sermons in that church are interactive and aimed at how to make a difference in the world at large.  

In discussions with some friends my age about the loss of connection to a community of faith, we’ve talked about the vibrant experiences we once had.  We wish that others could find similar kinds of experiences.  But it’s not clear how that can happen.  There’s a chasm between the teachings of Jesus that focus on actively loving one’s neighbor and the institutional need to keep church doors open and the lights on. 

As I reflect on this, it’s winter.  I look out from my window and see grass that is withered and brown and trees that have lost their leaves and look dead.  I look at church life and see something very similar:  life has gone dormant.  Perhaps this is the season that needs to happen.  Perhaps this is the time for the ground of religious life to go dormant and fallow. 


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What will the next season bring?  We really don’t know.  It’s not clear what seeds have been planted.  But it seems that this is a time to take heart and trust one’s individual spiritual path.  That doesn’t mean that we should live in a bubble or our own comfort zone.  Instead, we can each engage in our spiritual practice, allowing our prayer and practices to transform us.  As that transformation occurs, we’ll begin to engage in life in new ways.  Perhaps that may lead us to new connections with others, who like us, are seeking that deeper spiritual connection.

Of course, along the way, spiritual direction can be helpful.  That’s a spiritual practice that helps us from getting too focused on ourselves and can keep us looking beyond ourselves to something more.  In the meantime, it’s helpful to remember that all things in life flow in cycles.  Perhaps this is a cycle much like winter, when life is dormant, but will one day emerge with new life.

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