Over the last month, I’ve had video call conversations with over two dozen individuals I’ve never met in person. They are all graduate students enrolled in doctoral programs at the university where I teach. They live throughout North America and have been sheltering at home under various kinds of restrictions. In the US, restrictions vary by each state. My students, most of whom range in age from 35 to 55 years of age, are working adults who have achieved some level of success in their careers. Their current goal is the completion of a Ph.D. I work with them on various stages of their dissertation research.
Having this window into their homes, what has struck me most is the level of stress with which they are living. Many are caring for children and home-schooling them while also giving care to parents. The demands of their jobs have changed: some are laid off, some are expected to do more work, and others struggle to maintain work from home in the middle of homes crowded by other family members. I’ve simply begun conversations, asking questions like, “How’s it been going?” or “How are you doing?” Several simply broke-down crying.
I recognize that many people around the world are experiencing hardship and suffering because of this pandemic. Surely, those hospitalized and on respirators are suffering as well as their loved ones who cannot visit them. Other people suffer because they are stressed in ways for which they weren’t prepared, straining with hunger and wondering how to feed their families, forced to live with abusers, and sinking into pits of depression and despair. Still others wonder if there will be jobs to return to as entire industries close down. While sheltering at home may be relatively easy for some, that doesn’t diminish the depth of difficulty experienced by others.
Over the recent weeks, while I, as a Christian, have been observing the fifty days of the Easter Season and attuning myself to signs of new life, I’ve also reflected on a passage from Elie Wiesel’s famous book, The Night. Wiesel survived the Nazi concentration camps at Auschwitz and Buchenwald. The Night is an account of his experience in those camps in 1944 and 1945. It is written as an account told by a 15-year-old Eliezer, a fictionalized character who relates Wiesel’s experience.
A poignant passage recounts Eliezer witnessing the execution of three prisoners: two men and one boy. Standing in front of gallows, the three were ordered to stand on chairs as nooses were tightened around their necks. At the commander’s order, the chairs were kicked out from under them and the prisoners watched the three hang to death. The boy, who didn’t weigh as much as the men, struggled between life and death, hanging there for over half an hour before suffocating. In this sadistic setting, a prisoner shouted out, “For God’s sake, where is God?” After a pause, another responded: “God…He is there, hanging from the gallows.”
Few people experience the kind of horror that was the Nazi concentration camps of World War II. (To be sure, people are living with atrocious horrors in the world today but it’s often ignored.) Yet, many of us live with suffering of different kinds. My experience of painful times in life is that the only way to learn to live with significant difficulty is to experience the pain and move through it, looking for when we will come out the other side. Wishing it would change only makes it worse. Enduring can allow us to find moments of hope.
What Elie Wiesel’s account of horror conveys to me is that even in our darkest hour, when we are not sure that we can handle more pain, frustration, or agony, the presence of the Divine is with us. The Holy One is a witness to our suffering, joins us in the pain, and invites us to find inner strength and resilience. The circumstances may not change, but we can change … and endure.
As I speak to my students and to other people these days, I remind them that they are not alone. We are in this together. While I cannot say these words to my students because my role is as a professor and not as a minister or spiritual teacher, by listening with compassion I hope to convey that the Holy One is also with them in the midst of their pain. Yes, God is with us in these difficult times we experience today.
(Note: To reflect further on the experience of God in this pandemic, please see an earlier posting: https://bit.ly/3eU1l7k )
Photo by Trotaparamos on Foter.com / CC BY-NC-SA