Meditation apps, classes, books, and groups offer many techniques for this practice. Is there a right way to meditate? What if you’re doing it wrong? Let’s explore the right way to meditate.
The following is a text version of this posting.
Meditation. If you’re just starting to learn about meditation, it can be confusing. There are many different meditation apps, YouTube videos that explain different techniques, as well as books that elaborate on a variety of meditation practices. How do you choose? Which way is right? What happens if I get it wrong?
All kinds of questions probably cross your mind. Should I sit on the floor or in a chair? Should my eyes be open or closed? Should I begin with a mantra, a prayer word, or a chant? Do I imagine something or nothing at all? Is it all meditation? Is one better than another? What’s right and what’s wrong?
I understand why all of this is very confusing. Within every great spiritual and religious tradition, there are various ways to meditate. There are many different techniques. In all of these techniques, there’s only one distinction I want to make.
I think it’s important to recognize that there are many apps and videos that package guided relaxation and guided imagery as meditation. They’re not meditation. They are aids to relaxation. They have great benefits for people. They reduce stress, help to let go of worry and anxiety, and support a positive outlook on life. I am not knocking these tools. But I don’t understand them as meditation.
Meditation is a practice that allows us to get quiet on the inside and the outside. Meditation moves us into silence. It can take many forms. There’s the traditional image of someone sitting on a cushion with legs crossed, arms extended, and eyes gazing downward. Perhaps this person has focused attention on each breath. That’s a great way to do meditation. But it’s not how I meditate. I sit in a chair because I’m uncomfortable on the floor because of arthritis. My feet are planted on the floor. I close my eyes. I begin by repeating a prayer word, just one word, as I exhale. I enter into silence in that way. Some people chant. Some people fix their gaze on a lit candle, or an icon, or a flower, or a statue. There’s also walking meditation, which was the kind of meditation taught by Zen Master Thich Nhat Hahn. There are many different ways that one can use to meditate.
I don’t believe the actual technique matters. Yet, I recognize that many people are attached to their technique. It’s what works for them. They think everyone should use their technique. I understand that, but in the end, it’s not the technique that matters. What matters is going deeply into silence, into inner quiet, and allowing yourself to be there for some time, whether that’s ten minutes, twenty minutes, or a half hour.
Think about when you learned to drive a car. You were very focused on what to do. When my father taught me to drive a car, he explained that I should look at the hood ornament and line it up with the right side of the road. That way I’d know I was in the middle of the lane. I was very studious about that. I held my hands on the wheel at 2 and 10. I systematically rotated what I looked at: the road in front of me, the rear-view mirror, the side view mirror, back to the road in front of me. That’s how I drove when I was 16 and learning. I don’t drive that way now. It’s automatic for me. I get in the car and I simply drive.
Technique and instructions are important when beginning. But in time, like everything else, the technique becomes part of you. It’s like driving a car. After you’ve learned, you know what to do.
When you are doing meditation right, you’re no longer following a technique. Instead, you place yourself in silence, and meditation itself becomes your guide. You go where you need to go. Sometimes that will be into a deep silence. Sometimes it will be a sense of communion with someone beyond you. Sometimes emotions will be present – and you’ll learn to observe them while allowing them to simply unfold. Many times, nothing much will happen but you’ll be quiet. And, yes: there will be times when you fall asleep just because you’re tired.
When are you doing meditation the right way? You’re doing it correctly when meditation is part of you. It’s not the technique. It’s not how you sit or what you say or the candles or incense or anything else. It’s all about allowing yourself to simply be in the silence, allowing the silence to fill you and surround you.